October 28, 2004

Bible Bar

Have I said that I find contemporary Christianity ridiculous? See, I went to Mardels yesterday. For those of you out of state, it is a Christian Bookstore in Oklahoma. They also sell office supplies and I needed some paper. So, I buy the paper and am checking out and what do I see? The LOGIA: BIBLE BAR at the counter! Yay! It's the Bible, but in a bar form. At first I had hopes of a theology surrounding liquid bread (beer), but that clearly wasn't the issue. Instead, we have a nutritional or energy bar wrapped in the very history of Christianity all for sale. Yah!

Reading their website is a bit annoying. Read this crap and tell me how different it is from the marketing that sells diapers by appealing to women's guilt? Here, it is promising (based on vague references in Dueteronomy or some book) that their commercial product is Godly! Holy Fuck! A commercial product straight from the mind of God! I say again... Yay.

Sheesh................

..Indeed. the concept of eating the right foods is so important to God that He wastes no time in the Bible instructing us on how to eat properly:

......And God said, "See, I have given you every herb that yields seed which is on the face of all the earth, and every tree whose fruit yields seed; to you it shall be for food." (Genesis 1:29)

......The plot thickens when the first man and woman are further instructed and warned that eating improperly will cost them their lives:

.......And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, "Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die." (Genesis 2:16-17)

......It is easy to deduce two very important points then from these familiar scriptures as well as several others in the Bible. First of all, God most definitely has ordained a perfect eating plan for human beings – one that, when followed, will give us health, vitality, strength, long life, and yes. . . even wisdom. Secondly, eating the wrong foods can lead to unnecessary illnesses and even a premature death.

.......These two deductions form the core of what we at Logia call "Biblical Nutrition." It is our belief that God wants us to seek out these biblical principles of nutrition and diet as conveyed in the Holy Scriptures and then incorporate them into our daily lives.

......Furthermore, we believe that by eating properly, we enable our bodies to truly become the TEMPLE of the Holy Spirit and thus establish a closer bond with the LORD. Hence, Biblical Nutrition is not only about the physical needs of man, it is closely linked to our spiritual well being as well.

BIBLICAL NUTRITIONAL PRINCIPLES

All food should be eaten as close to its natural state as possible.
The more man processes his food, the less biblical it is.

Eating and drinking should always be done in moderation.

Artificial, man-made chemicals and additives should never be added to foods.

All foods should be grown organically as much as possible.

Fresh fruits, vegetables, seeds, grains and nuts constitute the principle categories of Biblical Nutrition foods.

The Bible mentions several health building foods by name. We should strive to incorporate as many of these foods as possible into our diet.



. With these principles in mind, Logia has set out to bring to the world a line of biblically based foods formulated to present the utmost in both nutritional and spiritual benefits. Our assurance to you is that each and every product we offer is made of the highest grade, all natural and purest food sources available. Furthermore, we use true organic ingredients whenever and wherever possible. Our motto is to bring you nutrition truly as God intended.

. Consequently, each of our products, such as the Bible Bar, contains all of the natural vitamins, minerals, enzymes, proteins, carbohydrates, fats, and fiber as placed in them by God Himself. None of our Logia food line is ever fortified with synthetic nutrients or artificial chemicals or additives. When you purchase any of our Logia foods of the Bible, you can have the peace of mind of knowing that they are the purest products on earth.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Whew....what will they think up next? Biblical condoms...each condom has a verse from Song of Solomon. Here are a few steamy verses to get us started!!! Yippee! We could call them SoS Condoms (get it “Song of Solomon”). Quote scripture while engaging in hot steamy sex!!

My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh
resting between my breasts. (SoS 1:13)

How handsome you are, my lover!
Oh, how charming! And our bed is verdant. (SoS 1:13)

Your eyes behind your veil are doves.
Your hair is like a flock of goats
descending from Mount Gilead. (SoS 4:1)

Your two breasts are like two fawns,
like twin fawns of a gazelle
that browse among the lilies. (SoS 4:5)

My lover is radiant and ruddy,
outstanding among ten thousand (SoS 5:10)

His head is purest gold;
his hair is wavy
and black as a raven. (SoS 5:11)

His mouth is sweetness itself;
he is altogether lovely. (SoS 5:16)

(Actually I really like SoS. One of my sweetest most favorite verses is SoS 2:14-15)