March 11, 2005

Demons, Ghosts and Elephants--Oh My

"In the Line of Fire" was on TV over the weekend and Clint asks the assassin the great question: "At night, when the demons come, what do you see?"

Those demons come at night--in that period between sleep and wakefulness--and poke at our fears and insecurities. You are worthless, you are a fraud. You are not smart or good or thoughtful. You are a bad friend, bad relative, bad husband, bad wife.

In the light of day, those same demons show up. Inner voices--snakes of doubt.

What of the mighty elephant? He sits in our living room while we take great effort to ignore him. I thought there was more sitting space in this room. It feels half the size. We walk around him--refusing to face him wishing he would leave, wishing he didn't constantly expose our basic fears.

Demons and elephants need confrontation. Demons to be told to shut the hell up. You aren't right and you aren't even that scary. Elephants just need recognition. The issue they represent is often not nearly as big as the effort used to avoid and ignore him. We need to say to him: Stampy, you are not a bad elephant, but you will ultimately kill us all if we don't take you outside. Now, here is a peanut.

Ghosts? Maybe we need to spend more time contemplating living with ghosts, or the ghosts that haunt me, or when a ghost is born. No, this isn't a 6th Sense kind of thing. It is just those people and pets and relationships that are in the room with us all the time. They have good things to tell us.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Your words resonate with me tonight especially your words about elephants. Thanks for giving voice to this. There's a big huge "elephant in the room" in my family right now and it's pretty painful. Initially, the family couldn't deny the elephant. We had no choice. We had to acknowledge it although each saw it differently and reacted differently. The issue is real and serious. Yet, now it seems we avoid the subject altogether to "maintain the peace". It's painful to watch and even more painful to participate. We each secretly hope it will eventually go away on it's own. But the truth is the issue won't resolve itself without some intervension. Every so often we bump into the elephant and it hurts. The elephant will stay as long as we give it room. It won't just disappear on it's own even if we will it to.

"We need to say to him: Stampy, you are not a bad elephant, but you will ultimately kill us all if we don't take you outside. Now, here is a peanut."

qBr