January 25, 2005

Down today

Not sure why. Maybe because I just read Caleb's blog and was further reminded of the grim job market for historians. Maybe because my job just changed again and I will soon report to my 6th supervisor in 4 years. Maybe because in the last year people I thought were friends turned out not. (Starting to feel paranoid. I thought I was a good friend, now starting to doubt that.)

I will be ok. My former advisor used to accuse me of brooding. That kind of annoyed me because it seemed hypercritical of my particular personality. But it is partially true. When I get down, I get tunnel vision and my perspective shrinks. I have become more aware of that as I have aged and now recognize it. I will work on that today.

There are many good things too. I just can't see them right now.

2 comments:

Caleb McDaniel said...

I hate to think I had anything to do with bringing you down. In my own twisted way, I intended to be somewhat encouraging about the fears we historians have about the job market.

I brood too. So at least know that you're not alone on days like this one. Here's hoping you cheer up soon.

Streak said...

Caleb,

I feared you might see that as a critical post. I didn't mean it that way. There really is a lot of good in that post and I appreciate it. I think it just hit a nerve.

The other part of that is to be careful what you wish for. I know people who have academic jobs and are not happy. There are many ways to make a difference in this world. Teaching college students is just one of them.

Peace.